so fierce and so clean

If I had an alter ego, she would be named Beyoncé. You can't say her name without attitude. I hadn't realized her new album was out until I walked into Best Buy, with the glamorous intention of buying a vacuum cleaner, when I saw her poster and let out a very uninhibited "whoaaaaa" despite the many employees circling the entrance. Her first single Run the World was awful, but the video had sick choreography and costume. Watching her perform always puts me in awe but also makes me feel inconsolable turmoil, as I am filled with the strongest longing to quit my day job and work at jazz clubs until I make it as a singing dancing sensation, but also the hard bitter truth that I neither have the talent nor dedication for that business. Nevertheless, her entire album is available to stream. It's her first self-managed album after her year hiatus. Enjoy!


P.S. About that vacuum cleaner. It has changed my life. I had been using a handheld to no avail, leaving me with a carpet from which I could grab fistfuls of hair. I finally realized hygiene was hygiene and shelled out the $100 for a proper upright Hoover. I had every intention of returning it after purchasing, but after filling up half the container with possibly a year's worth of dirt and hair (I don't judge you), I am never going to let anyone pry this machine out of my hands. Best purchase all year.

pesto cheddar crostinis, tea, and musings

I write to you from a sleep-deprived haze. Unlike the trials and tribulations of my classmates who are helping to save lives in hospitals, I found myself staying up all night due to a curious case of animal psychology. I awoke an hour after falling asleep to the sound of paper bags crunching and chairs being pushed around. After a moment of annoyance that my cat baby was pouncing about the kitchen, I decided to get up to play with him to tire him out. I grabbed his laser pointer and tried to get him to play, but he only looked casually at it and did not chase after it in a frenzy as he is apt to do. I put the laser pointer away, and noticed that he had run into the bathroom. As he never went into the bathroom without a person to bother, I followed him out of curiosity. Then I noticed a mouse on the floor. A small, grey, adorable mouse baby. And what was my cat baby doing?? Not attacking it ferociously as I would expect, but instead pouncing, holding the mouse in his mouth, and then releasing him to play with him more. At first I was annoyed. Was this senseless behavior the result of a cat living in luxury? That he would cease to perform basic cat duties in favor of finding himself through play? But as I watched him play I felt a sense of sympathy for his loneliness, that he would play with a mouse because he had no other cat friends to play with. Since I felt it irresponsible to have seen a mouse and let it go, I decided to let him play with the mouse to his heart's content by closing the bathroom door. Later on the evening, I opened it to find a nonchalant cat with a mangled mouse body. So he was useful for something after all. This was followed by another such mouse chase, hours of squeaking and pouncing, to be followed by crunching and another headless mouse body.

Pumpkin, having had his fill, left me no choice but to wake up and make my own breakfast. The winner of my Whole Foods shopping trip was a mild white cheddar cheese from the deli, $5 a pound and extremely flavorful. I toasted sprouted whole wheat bread, chopped smoked turkey and sauteed with cumin (cumin makes everything taste better, no?), and melted the cheese squares on top. Then I finished with a dollop of pesto, and poured milk into my lovely English breakfast tea. Though I did not attack my crostinis or paw at them for hours, I very much enjoyed this delightful breakfast!

cheap pinot grigio

I had originally only planned on writing up wines I really enjoyed, but since it is an early Monday night I may as well give my thoughts on a white I had this evening.

An argument for weekday drinking: I had this theory that I was having too much REM sleep (dream sleep) and that it was hindering my ability to focus during the day. Though REM has been implicated in processes such as memory consolidation, it is exhausting to wake up from a dream no matter when I am awoken. I did some research and apparently there is a correlation between depression/anxiety and hyper-REM sleep. The theory is that the worries you encounter during the day need an outlet and are dealt with by your brain at night, keeping you active mentally when you are supposed to be in slow wave sleep. You wake up exhausted from continuous mental activity and are unmotivated since you have exhausted your brain throughout the night. Therefore, I set out to suppress REM and see if it would lead to better sleep. The obvious choice: wine.


A shady way to pick a wine: I purchased this pinot grigio when I was actually looking for a pinot gris. I had had such a wonderful one at an Italian restaurant, a stunning recommendation from the waitress (so rare and so wonderful when it happens!) that I wanted to try some more myself. Unfortunately, I was too cheap to buy the cheapest pinot gris in the store and instead opted for this $7.99 bottle of the adjacently located pinot grigio.

This wine is a little harsh at first, hitting the upper part of your hard palate with the first few sips. As you continue drinking, it softens a bit and takes on a more sauvignon blanc flavor (acidic and ever so slightly reminiscent of what one would imagine cat urine to taste like). The flavor doesn't coat your entire mouth, but is a very, if faultingly so, bright white wine. I would probably try this again with a more savory but non-meaty dish, such as mushrooms, to see if the flavor of the food dampens the intensity of the wine. I myself tried it with a concoction of white cheddar slices floating around a hastily made guacamole. This dish will be featured on my future blog "Shit I Eat When I Am Lazy, But Actually Tastes A Lot Better Than It Sounds."

cumin lamb

My family's traditional "going out" cuisine is spicy spicy szechaun food, and this dish is an easy variation of a newly discovered favorite.

Per serving:
1. Slice 1 cup roast lamb and marinate briefly with 1/s tbsp cumin and 1/2 tbsp soy sauce.
2. Heat 1 tbsp olive or peanut oil and brown 4 cloves crushed, thinly sliced garlic and 4 chopped dry red chiles for 1 minute.
3. Thinly slice 1 small onion and saute until soft, adding a splash of sherry wine or other cooking wine along the way.
4. When the onions are done, add the lamb and saute until fragrant, about 5 minutes. Add more cumin as desired.
5. Serve with brown rice tossed with lemon juice and parsley. Eat!

mushroom spinach fettucine

Following my cathartic grocery shopping trip, I neglected to realize I had forgotten to purchase eggs or breakfast foods of any kind. Which brought me to my new, all cuisines for all meals lifestyle. This morning I made fettucine for breakfast (you're supposed to have your carbs in the morning anyway!) and it was a delicious and satisfying way to start the day.



Per serving:
1. Boil water and cook 4 oz pasta according to instructions. I used fresh spinach fettucine from a local pasta maker, which took only 2 minutes to cook!
2. Melt 1/2 tbsp butter in a pan and add 2 crushed, thinly sliced cloves of garlic.
3. Wash and drain 1 cup baby bella mushrooms and saute until soft.
4. Shred 2 tbsp parmesan over the mushrooms.
5. After the pasta is done, toss with the mushrooms (add more butter to taste) and top with fresh parmesan!

You know you have a problem with food when you decide to give up on ever fitting into your vintage DVF dress and use it instead as a backdrop for food photos.

messy chicken guac salad

The joys of rotisserie chicken part two! I whipped up the following salad before leaving for happy hour (my dollars will be better spent on alcohol) and ate it in such a frenzy that I forgot to take a palatable picture. Therefore, I give you a messy salad with chicken and guacamole. I like creative ways of using guac, as I am not a big fan of chips for their taste or nutrient properties. After mashing avocado with red onion in a bowl, I topped with baby leaves and chopped rotisserie chicken sauteed with garlic powder (I woefully removed the skin from the chicken bits as I glanced down at my ever expanding mid-section). Then, I mashed all of it together and ate it in several giant delicious bites! The guac and chicken mixture can also be served on endive leaves for a delightful appetizer.

Per serving:
1. Slice and mash 1/2 avocado and 1/4 cup diced red onion. Add a dash of salt and lemon juice (optional).
2. Chop 1/2 cup roast chicken and heat on a pan with a dash of garlic powder.
3. Top the guac with spring mix and the chicken, mix alltogether, and enjoy!